"Time to change" The Brady Bunch 

If I could turn back time
If I could find a way
I'd take back those words that've hurt you...

Haringey have told us that they feel that trust needs to be rebuilt on both sides. We have accepted this and our last write up of a meeting was approved by the person running the meeting... ...but have Haringey changed? Do they accept their responsibilities in successful partnership working with parent carers? Have they been mindful in their interactions with us?

I ain't gonna do you wrong, while you gone
I ain't gonna do you wrong because I don't wanna
All I'm askin' is for a little respect...

We just want to be treated as Haringey's Principle's of co-design say "... a commitment to ensuring that service clients and carers (experts by experience) are involved at the beginning of a process, working with professionals on an equal footing with the same value being given to everyone’s contribution".

http://www.difficultparent.com/the-principles-of-co-design

Honesty is such a lonely word.
Everyone is so untrue.
Honesty is hardly ever heard.
And mostly what I need from you.

We would like one version of the truth.
It is difficult for anyone, let alone parent carers, to scrutinise Haringey's SEND Reforms if we are not given a consistent version of events - we've underlined the bits that directly contradict one another

27th March 2019, SEND Reforms Meeting Presentation Papers

Gonna stand my ground, won't be turned around
And I'll keep this world from draggin' me down
Gonna stand my ground and I won't back down

So, we have been asked to a meeting about future parent engagement, but we have not been told where the meeting is.

We also asked that as many as possible parents were invited and included in the design of future engagement.

It will be useful to be able to flag up some of the more practical barriers that parents face regarding engagement. Like the location of meetings.

I find it is not just this meeting where that detail is missing, but also the proposed meetings regarding direct payments proposed for the end of April, which I note only a small select group of parents are aware of, as the same small select group where clearly told not to advertise the direct payments meetings in the SEND Reform meeting as location had not been decided.

I repeat, as I often do, in order to secure attendance and engagement of parents information needs to be shared in a timely way. Preferably as well in advance as possible, for example booking regular meetings on an annual basis and producing a calendar for a year.

A few weeks before an meeting is often not enough time for parents of the most severely disabled children, the ones you really need to hear from, to make the necessary arrangements for their families.

In addition, to repeatedly give the same advise about the practicalities of communication and engagement and for those not to be taken up also raise questions in my mind about whether parent representatives are being listened to as equal partners in the process of engagement.

Trust is a fragile thing, the local authority have stated that they feel that it needs to be rebuilt on both sides.

Don't leave me this way, now
I can't exist...

So, we were communicating with a very senior official, as recently as last Sunday, regarding the meeting with parents next Friday asking for the location, and then yesterday, only 4 days after our last communication, you can imagine our surprise when we got this reply:

I have now left Haringey Council, and these emails will not be viewed or actioned.

Please refer any matters to the relevant Head of Service:

SEND - XXXX XXXX

Youth Justice and Targeted Response - XXXX XXXX

Early Help & Prevention - XXXX XXXX

For any other matters, please contact XXXX XXXX who can identify the most appropriate person to assist you - XXXX.XXXX@haringey.gov.uk - 0208 489 XXXX